When it comes to finding a girl attractive, that's the easiest part. Complimenting someone on their looks can be tricky, so you have to say just the right thing. You won't want to make the girl uncomfortable or angry, which would accomplish the opposite of your goal.
Whether the girl is someone you've liked for a while or just someone you find attractive, there are plenty of opportunities that a compliment may bring. This is why it is essential to come up with something that works perfectly with the situation at hand.
These tips will help you navigate the intricacies of a good compliment.
Should I Compliment Her?
Knowing whether or not to compliment someone can be a confusing thing. Some girls may be less approachable than others, which you need to look out for. Some girls are simply off-limits, and you will have to accept that now is not the time to go after the girl you may be interested in. Here are some of the situations that you may want to avoid giving compliments to her:
If She's Busy.
She may be very apprehensive to happily accept a compliment if she is busy doing other things. Whether she's on the phone or just eating some food, you may want to give her some space until she looks less busy.
If She's Completely Alone.
If you are not in a very public place and she is alone, you may want to refrain from approaching her. It could make her nervous or scare her off, since other guys may have much worse intentions than you. If the area is more public and plenty of people around, it may be a safer space for you to approach.
If You Are in a Big Group of Friends.
Some girls don't want an audience of all their friends to witness someone else flirting with her, let alone someone who is also their friend. If you guys are close enough, you may want to wait until just the two of you. That way, you can open up the opportunity for her to flirt back, which can help gauge how she feels about the situation.
If She's at Work.
No one wants to be approached when they are on the clock. Work can already be nerve-wracking and stressful enough, and you don't want to add on to her plate. Many people in customer service have to deal with the stresses of being hit on constantly, so that won't even make you stand out. Plus, you don't want to come off as one of her regulars who harasses her on the job. It will look bad on you and may decrease the chances of her ever talking to you outside of her job.
If She Has a Significant Other.
Respecting someone else's relationship is very important. You don't want to get in the middle of something private, and you'll probably end up making both of the people in that relationship uncomfortable. Plus, you could make her significant other angry or upset and cause a scene you don't want to be in. This may be one of the times that you have to accept your losses and move on.
And lastly, don't compliment her if you are only hoping for one in return. Compliments aren't meant to be selfish, and many people will be able to tell when you aren't just giving a compliment to be nice. You may end up with your feelings or pride hurt. A girl doesn't have to return the favor just because you said something nice to her, and most won't.
This isn't because they don't see anything attractive about you. It's just simply because they aren't thinking about saying something back. Some girls may be caught off guard and have to process what you said, especially when they didn't expect it.
How to Compliment Her
Don't Start Out With a Compliment.
You don't want your opening line to be about her looks, as most girls will not receive that well. Carry on a conversation about anything so that you've built up some talking points. And as you talk to her more and look at her more, you may find plenty of new things that you find attractive. This will also give you more time to plan out what you say so that it is unique to the conversation.
Keep It Subtle.
When complimenting a girl, the last thing you want to do is overwhelm her. Make sure that what you are saying isn't taking things too far, especially if you are not super comfortable with it. A subtle compliment can appear much more casual and will not make it seem like you spent days preparing what you were going to say. A girl may feel creeped out if she can tell that you've spent a very long time planning out what you were going to say to her, especially if she doesn't know you well at all.
Keep It Short.
No one wants to hear you awkwardly ramble on about a girl's physical appearance. If you are going to compliment her on her looks, make sure that you keep things short and sweet. The longer it takes to get the complement out, the more uncomfortable she will probably become. This complement shouldn't be the biggest deal in the world, so don't make it out to be that.
Be Creative.
It is easy to compliment a girl by using some of the most common or cheesy pickup lines. But if you really want to catch a girl's attention, it is best to stray away from that technique. The best way to win her over is to tailor the complement specifically to her. For example, if the girl has a super welcoming smile, don't just tell her that she has a "pretty" smile. You want to make this girl feel special as if this is something you would not just say to any other girl.
Keep It PG.
Although your intentions may go deeper than keeping things PG, it is important to keep your compliments toward her as PG as they can be. If your only compliments are full of sexual connotation and innuendo, then she will know that you have a goal, rather than just complimenting her for the sake of it.
The best way to prevent any feelings of discomfort is to focus on the lighter things. Refrain from using the words "sexy," "hot," or "smokin." These words may make her feel as though you already have ulterior motives.
Refrain From Physicality.
Although the odds aren't super high, simply complimenting a girl on her physical appearance may make her uncomfortable. So, if you are already complimenting her, you may want to refrain from any form of physical touch. It is best not to push any buttons, especially if you want her to feel good about herself.
Mean It.
If you tell a girl that she has a beautiful smile, you better believe that she does. If you don't completely mean it, there is no point in complimenting someone to be nice. Many people will be able to tell when you are not being genuine, and you could end up greatly hurting someone's feelings rather than lifting them.
And the whole point of complimenting someone is to make them feel good about something that you appreciate about them. If you mean what you say, then she will know that it is something you feel, rather than something anyone could just notice about her.
Make It About Choice.
When creating your compliment, try to focus it on the way she chooses to look. So, instead of telling her that you like her eyes, tell her that her eyeshadow brings out the color of her eyes. This way, she will feel as though you appreciate her style compared to the parts that she can't control. And this will also show that you are paying attention to the details of her style, rather than just focusing on something about her that she doesn't ever change.
The Takeaway
No matter what, complimenting a girl should not be a big feat. Have fun with it, and just focus on making someone's day. Being nice is the biggest part of complimenting others, and you get to make someone feel great about themselves. And making others feel good will make you feel good as well.
If you are mindful of other people's situations and thoughtful with what you say, you should have no problem with your compliments. Who knows, if you are creative enough, you may be able to say the compliment that will win over the girl of your dreams.
No comments yet, leave yours!